Were you born an asshole or did you work at it your whole life?

[Illustrious Potentate]

Me, I’m naturally a really nice guy, happy drunk and everything, so I have to work hard to be an asshole, but nothing worth having comes easy.

How about you?

 

[douggie]

I just remembered this tune.

 

[Illustrious Potentate]

I just remembered this tune.

Haven’t heard that one in years. “He’d spent a thousand dollars on a hundred dollar show” Sounds like something I’d do

 

[fordman84]

I started out having to work really hard at it. Then I found inter web message boards and discovered that I'm genetically predisposed to being an internet-alpha-asshole. We are a rare breed, but definitely necessary to keep wannabe's in check.

 

[RP-29]

Me, I’m naturally a really nice guy, happy drunk and everything, so I have to work hard to be an asshole, but nothing worth having comes easy.

Again, opposite. I'm naturally an asshole and work really hard to be a nice guy. "Asshole me" is a viscous demon capable of anything.

I lock "Asshole me" in a cage and do everything in my power to keep him there...
- I don't drink or get high - keeps the cage locked.
- I go to church regularly and study scripture - adds more cages around him.
- I keep people clear of the cages - directly associate with only a tight group of people who are comfortable and wise enough to navigate effectively around the cages. I stay off social media.

Occasionally, other oblivious idiots poke and prod at "Asshole me" - if they happen to get through my cages and reach him, he lashes out with ferocity.

 

[HammerDown]

Me, I’m naturally a really nice guy, happy drunk and everything, so I have to work hard to be an asshole, but nothing worth having comes easy.

How about you?

Have you asked @Peter Gozintite for advice?

 

[Illustrious Potentate]

Have you asked @Peter Gozintite for advice?

I’m not styling my hair, so no

 

[SlinkyRedfoot]

I didn't know I was an asshole until @HammerDown told me. Since that day, I feel like I've embraced the roll.

 

[SlinkyRedfoot]

Have you asked @Peter Gozintite for advice?

FUCK PETER!

 

[HammerDown]

I’m not styling my hair, so no

If you're actually trying to be an asshole, Peter is your one-stop shop for advice and inspiration.

 

[fordman84]

I didn't know I was an asshole until @HammerDown told me. Since that day, I feel like I've embraced the roll.

role

 

[Handicappers]

probably genetic for me. but I take medicine.

 

[fordman84]

If you're actually trying to be an asshole, Peter is your one-stop shop for advice and inspiration.

@Peter Gozintite is the gold standard we all strive to achieve.

 

[HammerDown]

@Peter Gozintite is the gold standard we all strive to achieve.

He needs to suspend operations of Peter Gozintite Plumbing & Electrical and host "Asshole 101" clinics in Vegas. Hell, he could even take his students out on the strip and demonstrate his techniques.

 

[SlinkyRedfoot]

role

Eye have know idea what ewe might bee talking about.

Dickhead.

 

[fordman84]

He needs to suspend operations of Peter Gozintite Plumbing & Electrical and host "Asshole 101" clinics in Vegas. Hell, he could even take his students out on the strip and demonstrate his techniques.

I hear Progressive Insurance is going to be doing some commercials on him and "How not to be a pushover like your parents" series.

 

[Handicappers]

@Peter Gozintite is the gold standard we all strive to achieve.

That's why he's the dictator of The Crew

 

[Kburjr]

So, 95% of you are assholes and 5% of you are liars?

 

[Knight&Day]

It depends on what your definitions of "asshole" and "nice guy" are.

 

[williewilliejuan]

I was a sweet baby. I came into assholerly later in my adolescence.