Faptastic Friday

Guy Incognito

Guy Incognito

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Hoping we can play baseball tomorrow. Fields didn't look great yesterday (we practiced in the outfield), and that was before it rained overnight. Township has already cancelled their games, but I'd rather play on a Saturday than try to reschedule during the week. Board is meeting tonight to do some final touch-ups for tomorrow, so we'll decide then if it's worth working on the fields to make sure they're playable.
 
I have to poop but I don't want to.
 
I'm the coach of my son's pre-k 4 school soccer team. First game tomorrow. We better win. At practice the other day I was trying to instill tactics and one of the kids said 'poopy butt' and I wanted to tell the little shit to run laps.
 
That's what I'm talking about. I don't want anyone calling me a poopy butt.
 
ChiSoxFan said:
I'm the coach of my son's pre-k 4 school soccer team. First game tomorrow. We better win. At practice the other day I was trying to instill tactics and one of the kids said 'poopy butt' and I wanted to tell the little shit to run laps.
Click to expand...
When I first started coaching little kids, I felt badly about not liking some of them. I felt like it was mean to dislike a little kid.

After years of coaching, I now have no issues admitting that I don't like a kid.

Also, I've noticed a recurring theme that if I don't like a kid, his/her parents are shitheads.
 
SlinkyRedfoot said:
When I first started coaching little kids, I felt badly about not liking some of them. I felt like it was mean to dislike a little kid.

After years of coaching, I now have no issues admitting that I don't like a kid.

Also, I've noticed a recurring theme that if I don't like a kid, his/her parents are shitheads.
Click to expand...
Last year my son was playing goalie and could have prevented a slow rolling shot easily and just looked at it like it was a butterfly or something and it went in as he stood there. I fell to my knees in what seemed like slow motion. Haunts me.

Like this, sorta kinda:

 
SlinkyRedfoot said:
When I first started coaching little kids, I felt badly about not liking some of them. I felt like it was mean to dislike a little kid.

After years of coaching, I now have no issues admitting that I don't like a kid.

Also, I've noticed a recurring theme that if I don't like a kid, his/her parents are shitheads.
Click to expand...
I gave them a talking to the other day about how this year we needed to improve upon last year and the parents in the stands looked at me like I was a lunatic for not just saying some faggy shit like "have fun out there ya hear?!"
 
ChiSoxFan said:
I gave them a talking to the other day about how this year we needed to improve upon last year and the parents in the stands looked at me like I was a lunatic for not just saying some faggy shit like "have fun out there ya hear?!"
Click to expand...
PreK?
 
SlinkyRedfoot said:
PreK?
Click to expand...
Yeah they are 4-5. While I'm naturally injecting some humor here I did let them know we want to try and win some games this year. Some of the teams we played last year steamrolled us and seemingly had steroid users on their roster.
 
SlinkyRedfoot said:
When I first started coaching little kids, I felt badly about not liking some of them. I felt like it was mean to dislike a little kid.

After years of coaching, I now have no issues admitting that I don't like a kid.

Also, I've noticed a recurring theme that if I don't like a kid, his/her parents are shitheads.
Click to expand...
I'm the first to admit that my son is a little asshole. Last soccer season was actually the best he behaved on the field. During previous years, he'd get mad when he kicked the ball out of bounds or missed the goal and go run off the field crying. He wasn't doing that by the end of the season.
 
SlinkyRedfoot said:
You just want me to say I did it so you can post "pics or gtfo."
Click to expand...

Jack Nicholson Yes GIF
 
ChiSoxFan said:
I gave them a talking to the other day about how this year we needed to improve upon last year and the parents in the stands looked at me like I was a lunatic for not just saying some faggy shit like "have fun out there ya hear?!"
Click to expand...
For me, I use rec ball as a chance to give kids reps. Winning comes because they're doing things right, not because that's what I'm focusing on.

One thing that worked for me in soccer this past season was grouping kids and playing them at the same position the whole game. So I did 3 back, 3 mid, 2 forward, if I had the whole team I had enough kids to sub out one on the back, one mid, and one forward. In previous years, I just kind of threw subs out piecemeal in a "who needs a break/hasn't come out?" approach. There will be plenty of kids who don't like playing back or whatever, but if they're just doing it for a game or a half, they buy into it more, and it will help the kids who keep playing when someone is blocking them from playing their "preferred" position on a travel team or school team, that they understand a bit about how to play somewhere else on the field.
 
ChiSoxFan said:
Yeah they are 4-5. While I'm naturally injecting some humor here I did let them know we want to try and win some games this year. Some of the teams we played last year steamrolled us and seemingly had steroid users on their roster.
Click to expand...
I've never coached kids that young. ...Because I didn't want to. That's too young for my patience. Coaching high school is too old for my patience, too. 4th through 6th grade is the sweet spot - they want to learn, they want to be competitive, are willing to take instruction and still respect authority.
 
Guy Incognito said:
For me, I use rec ball as a chance to give kids reps. Winning comes because they're doing things right, not because that's what I'm focusing on.

One thing that worked for me in soccer this past season was grouping kids and playing them at the same position the whole game. So I did 3 back, 3 mid, 2 forward, if I had the whole team I had enough kids to sub out one on the back, one mid, and one forward. In previous years, I just kind of threw subs out piecemeal in a "who needs a break/hasn't come out?" approach. There will be plenty of kids who don't like playing back or whatever, but if they're just doing it for a game or a half, they buy into it more, and it will help the kids who keep playing when someone is blocking them from playing their "preferred" position on a travel team or school team, that they understand a bit about how to play somewhere else on the field.
Click to expand...
I ran into player shortages all last season so it was chaos and borrowing players to get over the hump.
 
RP-29 said:
I've never coached kids that young. ...Because I didn't want to. That's too young for my patience. Coaching high school is too old for my patience, too. 4th through 6th grade is the sweet spot - they want to learn, they want to be competitive, are willing to take instruction and still respect authority.
Click to expand...
My son's school requires service hours from parents if the kids play in a sports program. I have the option to give them cash to forego doing them, and offered to do so but they said they badly needed the hours compared to the cash. So I'm in it to win it going this route.
 
Believe our opening day is a month from now. Still haven't heard who I'm helping coach with or kids on the team besides my own. As mentioned before, I didn't willingly volunteer for this one like I had in football & somewhat in wrestling.
 
Guy Incognito said:
For me, I use rec ball as a chance to give kids reps. Winning comes because they're doing things right, not because that's what I'm focusing on.
Click to expand...
That's what losers always say.
 
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