tOfficial Night Shift Thread v65, the thread no one wanted to start.

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If you're paid bi-monthy you get 24 "paychecks" a year. If you're paid bi-weekly, you get 26 "checks" a year.
 
Oh god...

VP: Hu, can your team help with the following audit requests?
Me: Sure! Team member #3, can you take the lead on this?
Team member #3: I got this same request directly from the auditor the other day and I already responded
Me: Great!
VP: So TM#3, what did you respond with?
TM3: I sent the demographics and status changes, but I don't have access to intakes so I didn't send that. TM2 has the intakes stuff.
Me and VP at the same time: Why didn't you ask team member #2 to assist you with the intake docs? You sent incomplete data and you're telling us "I already responded?"
TM3: Well, I responded with what I could.
VP: huuuuUUUUUUUU!!!! Get your team in order!! This is an audit!
How does that saying go? Your team is only as strong as your dumbest asshole? Err sumptin'.
 
If you're paid bi-monthy you get 24 "paychecks" a year. If you're paid bi-weekly, you get 26 "checks" a year.
I get one every other Friday. So…it’s either the former or the latter. I ain’t doing the maths on that.
 
I get one every other Friday. So…it’s either the former or the latter. I ain’t doing the maths on that.

Easy peasy. Pay attention. There are 12 months in a year, ok? If you are paid twice a month that's 12 * 2 = 24.

There are 52 weeks in a year. If you get paid every other week it's 52/2 = 26.
 
you are bi....






weekly then
not that there's anything wrong with that seinfeld GIF by myLAB Box
 
Yep! Dead as a doornail.


Que es a doornail and when would they ever be considered not dead? :headscratch:
When they haven't been hammered in yet. Once hammered in, it's dead, cuz it can't be removed/used again.
 
Easy peasy. Pay attention. There are 12 months in a year, ok? If you are paid twice a month that's 12 * 2 = 24.

There are 52 weeks in a year. If you get paid every other week it's 52/2 = 26.
Omg. You lost me at 12.

Actually, you lost me at “pay attention” but I struggled for another second before I quit.
 
You mean…take it private? Like what he said he was gonna do from the very beginning?
yesmaam-ani.gif

This gunna be GUD!!! Get yer popcorn and gin at the ready...

"Mr. Mean Tweets" FTW!! :pound:

:pop2::martini:
 
Our pay periods end on the 15 and the last day of the month. Payroll gets ten days to process and we get paid on the 10th and 25th (or the Friday before if a weekend/holiday).

aren’t there songs about getting paid on the 1st & 15th? That’s welfare days? We just do every other Friday which is either bi-weekly or bi-monthly…I can never remember which.

Close. Getting 2 paychecks per month is semi-monthly.

Evidently, he's into "bi"... :heh:

"Bi" can go either way: It can mean twice a month or every 2 months. It's "bi" at its essence.

Duh!

 
Yep! Dead as a doornail.


Que es a doornail and when would they ever be considered not dead? :headscratch:
Need some kinda Entemman'sologist to answer that

Or wait, I'll googlie it: Dead As A Doornail Idiom Definition And Origin

TL;DR: carpenters in the middle ages would make a nail "dead" by bending its head over on itself. It made for a stronger hold, but you could then never re-use the nail, hence "it's dead." Aka "Clinching" a nail. For some reason this was popular with nails used in doors. I'm guessing the decorative type:

1666980747300.png
 
Need some kinda Entemman'sologist to answer that

Or wait, I'll googlie it: Dead As A Doornail Idiom Definition And Origin

TL;DR: carpenters in the middle ages would make a nail "dead" by bending its head over on itself. It made for a stronger hold, but you could then never re-use the nail, hence "it's dead." Aka "Clinching" a nail. For some reason this was popular with nails used in doors. I'm guessing the decorative type:

View attachment 89791


This spikes my interest.
 
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