tOfficial Not really a Night Shift Thread v60, with less spicy sauce.

[beardown07]

Sitting on the beach burning one and drinking a beer by myself at midnight. The fuck do you married bitches know about that?

Dude that is almost the literal definition of marriage.

 

[Camfantasy]

Dude that is almost the literal definition of marriage.

Stopppppp. I can walk to the water and fuck a mermaid in the ass if I want to.

 

[Camfantasy]

And that's 25% of the image size because hammer's site fucking sucks fyi.

 

[huskers1217]

I went all in on the Giants

fml

 

[gobigred]

fml

 

[HammerDown]

gbr and vita and nos conspired to steal my vCash.

and some other guys, too.

 

[gobigred]

gbr and vita and nos conspired to steal my vCash.

and some other guys, too.

I blame @BusSport

 

[Inquisitor]

gbr and vita and nos conspired to steal my vCash.

and some other guys, too.

 

[Dolemite censored]

@moxie : Try this anti-coyote, anti hawk vest for your little beastie.

 

[gobigred]

You can be the Bookie now, I hear you have time on your hands

 

[HammerDown]

You can be the Bookie now, I hear you have time on your hands

I wouldn't last a day.

 

[gobigred]

I wouldn't last a day.

I meant @Inquisitor since he is retired and needs something to do

 

[moxie]

Alexa is a Chinese spy.

I have a pile of clothes that I didn’t take on vacation that needs to be put away, but I needed to take the dog out so I threw on a T-shirt dress from the pile and say, “eh, this’ll work”. I get the dog’s leash on and Alexa beeps so I ask her to tell me my notifications and she says, “You bought a something something T-shirt from Amazon last week. Would you like to rate it?”

 

[Dolemite censored]

Alexa is a Chinese spy.

I have a pile of clothes that I didn’t take on vacation that needs to be put away, but I needed to take the dog out so I threw on a T-shirt dress from the pile and say, “eh, this’ll work”. I get the dog’s leash on and Alexa beeps so I ask her to tell me my notifications and she says, “You bought a something something T-shirt from Amazon last week. Would you like to rate it?”

No way do I want any of those devices anywhere near me.

Just for laughs, say, "Alexa call the cops". Let me know what happens.

 

[Dolemite censored]

so I threw on a T-shirt dress from the pile and say, “eh, this’ll work”.

Do you also have those rollers in your hair? Like, Walmart style...

 

[moxie]

Do you also have those rollers in your hair? Like, Walmart style...

No! It's in a super high pony to keep it out of my face and off my neck.

 

[ukfanfrombirth (cali cat)]

Alexa is a Chinese spy.

I have a pile of clothes that I didn’t take on vacation that needs to be put away, but I needed to take the dog out so I threw on a T-shirt dress from the pile and say, “eh, this’ll work”. I get the dog’s leash on and Alexa beeps so I ask her to tell me my notifications and she says, “You bought a something something T-shirt from Amazon last week. Would you like to rate it?”

I don't know if anyone could pay me enough money to have one of those things in my house, or anything like an Alexa.

 

[moxie]

I don't know if anyone could pay me enough money to have one of those things in my house, or anything like an Alexa.

Yeah, it's creepy AF. I really only use it for music. Or sometimes I have her read to me when I'm drunk. But that mostly ends up with me screaming at her because she can't understand what I'm asking.
Still trying to figure out how to get her, Siri, Cortana and the Google kid to get into an argument.

 

[williewilliejuan]

I don't know if anyone could pay me enough money to have one of those things in my house, or anything like an Alexa.

We have a Google assistant. I don’t have much use for it other than it seems to like me better than my wife, which low key pisses her off. It’s always good for a little fun for me.

 

[Dolemite censored]

I don't know if anyone could pay me enough money to have one of those things in my house, or anything like an Alexa.

Yeah, it's creepy AF. I really only use it for music. Or sometimes I have her read to me when I'm drunk. But that mostly ends up with me screaming at her because she can't understand what I'm asking.
Still trying to figure out how to get her, Siri, Cortana and the Google kid to get into an argument.

We have a Google assistant. I don’t have much use for it other than it seems to like me better than my wife, which low key pisses her off. It’s always good for a little fun for me.

Those things can autonomously contact authorities if they perceive a "threat".

Hard pass.