Cheating at Chess with Anal Beads

Pointed out on Reddit that the king symbol rotated upside-down looks like sticking something with an antenna up the ass: :o

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Amazing post from 4chan turning this story into a Netflix trailer:

>a single high-pitched piano key
>"for as long as I can remember, I wanted to be a grandmaster"
>slowmo shot of Hans walking down a dark corridor from behind
>cut to his face, played by Timothee Chalamet, looking angry and focused
>"and I'd do whatever it took to get there..."
>cut to Magnus Carlson, played by Ryan Reynolds, sitting at the chess table and looking up at Hans
>THE CHESS MATCH THAT CHANGED THE WORLD
>dramatic fast-paced violin music starts playing
>Magnus plays a move, nervously
>cut to Carlson's coach, played by Idris Elba, is seriously trying to talk to Magnus
>"YOU CAN'T PLAY HIM! YOU KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN!"
>"Yes... but maybe..."
>Cut to Hans chatting to Andrea Botez, played by Charlie D'Amelio, as they lay half naked in bed together
>"This match against Magnus. It will eat me"
>Andrea hugs him
>"It might force me to go further than I've ever gone..."
>cut to Hans screaming at himself in a mirror with the sound cut out
>Hans moves a knight back in the match
>Magnus looking very serious riding in the back of a limo
>cut to Hans chatting to his coach, Maxim Dlugy, played by Mark Rylance
>"Hans my boy, not everyone can be good. Sometimes more..."advanced" tactics are needed..."
>"More advanced? Like what?..."
>Dlugy pulls out a set of anal beads
>Hans stares at them, conflicted
>cut to Gotham on youtube, played by Seth Rogen
>"Ladies and gents have we got an upcoming match that will knock your socks off?!"
>titlecard: Carlson v Niemann: Game On
>black
>slowly fade to a zen garden with Magnus talking to someone off-screen
>"I know we're not friends, but I could use some advice..."
>camera reveals he's talking to Hikaru, played by Simu Liu, smiling at him
>"This game supersedes any petty rivalry. Come Magnus-san, much to discuss, we have"
>COMING SOON
 
Amazing post from 4chan turning this story into a Netflix trailer:

>a single high-pitched piano key
>"for as long as I can remember, I wanted to be a grandmaster"
>slowmo shot of Hans walking down a dark corridor from behind
>cut to his face, played by Timothee Chalamet, looking angry and focused
>"and I'd do whatever it took to get there..."
>cut to Magnus Carlson, played by Ryan Reynolds, sitting at the chess table and looking up at Hans
>THE CHESS MATCH THAT CHANGED THE WORLD
>dramatic fast-paced violin music starts playing
>Magnus plays a move, nervously
>cut to Carlson's coach, played by Idris Elba, is seriously trying to talk to Magnus
>"YOU CAN'T PLAY HIM! YOU KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN!"
>"Yes... but maybe..."
>Cut to Hans chatting to Andrea Botez, played by Charlie D'Amelio, as they lay half naked in bed together
>"This match against Magnus. It will eat me"
>Andrea hugs him
>"It might force me to go further than I've ever gone..."
>cut to Hans screaming at himself in a mirror with the sound cut out
>Hans moves a knight back in the match
>Magnus looking very serious riding in the back of a limo
>cut to Hans chatting to his coach, Maxim Dlugy, played by Mark Rylance
>"Hans my boy, not everyone can be good. Sometimes more..."advanced" tactics are needed..."
>"More advanced? Like what?..."
>Dlugy pulls out a set of anal beads
>Hans stares at them, conflicted
>cut to Gotham on youtube, played by Seth Rogen
>"Ladies and gents have we got an upcoming match that will knock your socks off?!"
>titlecard: Carlson v Niemann: Game On
>black
>slowly fade to a zen garden with Magnus talking to someone off-screen
>"I know we're not friends, but I could use some advice..."
>camera reveals he's talking to Hikaru, played by Simu Liu, smiling at him
>"This game supersedes any petty rivalry. Come Magnus-san, much to discuss, we have"
>COMING SOON

Like, The Queen's Gambit, but more current:

 
Programmer Ron Sijm has now posted Buttfish, open-source software which can use Morse code to transmit moves from chess engine Stockfish to buttplugs.
 
Hans Niemann has now filed a $100 million lawsuit against Magnus Carlsen, Chess.com, and Hikaru Nakamura for accusing him of cheating.
 
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Wall Street Journal: "Chess Investigation Finds That U.S. Grandmaster Likely Cheated More Than 100 Times"

So if you haven't been following this story, a few weeks ago, Magnus Carlsen, the World Chess Champion and World #1 in chess, withdrew from a chess tournament, accusing his opponent, 19-year-old Grandmaster Hans Niemann who is in the US top 10, of cheating by secretly getting computer assistance. This turned into a huge scandal in the chess community.

An investigation now appears to confirm Hans Niemann's cheating.

The exact mechanism that Hans Niemann was using to get computer assistance is unknown, but a rumor is that he was using anal beads that had been modified to receive radio signals to vibrate to signal computer moves. :eek:

:wtf:

Maybe he was getting ready for a knight out....
 
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