Was in Miami last few days. Impressions:
1. By law, women must dress as close to naked as possible, or they'll be fined.
2. Fucking Miami International airport is fucking huge. The distance from one end of the baggage claim area to the other can be over a mile. They have those automatic trains running between concourses and the car rental area.
3. The official language is Spanish, followed by Haitian French. If you speak English, you'll have to find your own interpreter to communicate.
4. The freeways remind me of a bowl of spaghetti dropped on the ground and left there.
5. Lane change turn signals are prohibited.
6. Did I mention that it was hot and humid as fuck?
7. Parking spots have been largely eliminated. The ones left will rob you blind.
8. Motor scooters and stand up scooters are the principle means of transportation, and their operators do not need to heed traffic signals.
9. I only stay at hotels that offer a "free" complimentary buffet breakfast. Pulled pork can be served with sausage patties and sausage links with your eggs.
10. The Everglades are full of alligators and mosquitoes.
11. Cubans are arrogant, ungrateful pricks.
12. Alaska airlines "food" consists of pathetic packaged snacks, and 3 oz. wine drinks are $9.50, 3 oz. spirits are $12.50.
13. Restaurants automatically ad an 18% gratuity, and still leave a line open on the check for further tipping.
1. By law, women must dress as close to naked as possible, or they'll be fined.
2. Fucking Miami International airport is fucking huge. The distance from one end of the baggage claim area to the other can be over a mile. They have those automatic trains running between concourses and the car rental area.
3. The official language is Spanish, followed by Haitian French. If you speak English, you'll have to find your own interpreter to communicate.
4. The freeways remind me of a bowl of spaghetti dropped on the ground and left there.
5. Lane change turn signals are prohibited.
6. Did I mention that it was hot and humid as fuck?
7. Parking spots have been largely eliminated. The ones left will rob you blind.
8. Motor scooters and stand up scooters are the principle means of transportation, and their operators do not need to heed traffic signals.
9. I only stay at hotels that offer a "free" complimentary buffet breakfast. Pulled pork can be served with sausage patties and sausage links with your eggs.
10. The Everglades are full of alligators and mosquitoes.
11. Cubans are arrogant, ungrateful pricks.
12. Alaska airlines "food" consists of pathetic packaged snacks, and 3 oz. wine drinks are $9.50, 3 oz. spirits are $12.50.
13. Restaurants automatically ad an 18% gratuity, and still leave a line open on the check for further tipping.
