Yeah, it's pretty convenient. We've been buying these carbonated drinks in a can and then just add our own fancy-ass ice cubes, nice glasses, spices, booze. Works well.
Yeah, it's pretty convenient. We've been buying these carbonated drinks in a can and then just add our own fancy-ass ice cubes, nice glasses, spices, booze. Works well.
nah bro like i said, i did your mom when WE were 12. WE havent been 12 for 26 years (goin on 27) figured you knew how old WE are. SMH lemme talk to your mom
nah bro like i said, i did your mom when WE were 12. WE havent been 12 for 26 years (goin on 27) figured you knew how old WE are. SMH lemme talk to your mom
so, i got drunk multiple times in the last few weeks. one of them started off as a buzz at a bar where i met a cat who got all of the crazy references i throw out. said he could do some yard work. i always have leaves. came by the one day, said, yeah, it'd be this much (a pittance) X hours at most. said he gets up early would be around by 7... never showed up the first day..... never contacted me until like 3 days later, family emergency came up, the day he finally started, just to clear the leaves out of my yard.... what a fucking chore it's been. cat came on two separate occasions now, paid him slightly more than the original quote, said he won't take anymore money and i already paid him too much, through this process, I'd say I'm paying for this guy's drug habit, but if that were the case, he'd have finished on day 1.
i get it, you're mad cuz i called you out for your gayness, then rubbed it in your face that i plowed your mom while you were snuggling your teddy bear.
i get it, you're mad cuz i called you out for your gayness, then rubbed it in your face that i plowed your mom while you were snuggling your teddy bear.
Dont be Gay. You're just a tiny, insignificant little speck and the only ones that would even slightly care about you are other, equally tiny and insignificant little specks on a slightly larger, but still insignificant speck on a playing field so large no speck mind could ever imagine comprehending it, and nothing any of us specks say or do will ever create any kind of microscopic ripple that goes anywhere beyond our zone of speckiness, your life is useless, kiddo, and nothing anyone ever does will amount to anything in the universe, we could all die at this very second and the universe would still go on, nothing matters, the human race should just commit mass suicide to at the very least save mother nature on the earth we are an infectious disease upon. The world will end someday, and the universe will go on without us, never even stopping to even think about any small achievement that any human ever made. You will never see other planets, you're stuck on this shithole we call earth. And that's why you should just end your sorry life now and save yourself the trouble of having to come to terms with your own uselessness. you are nothing, everything is nothing , and the sooner we realize that, the better off we will be as a species.
Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels. Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the “loser,” and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round. I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment. When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3×5 card reading, “Please use this M&M for breeding purposes.” This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this “grant money.” I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion. There can be only one.
Dont be Gay. You're just a tiny, insignificant little speck and the only ones that would even slightly care about you are other, equally tiny and insignificant little specks on a slightly larger, but still insignificant speck on a playing field so large no speck mind could ever imagine comprehending it, and nothing any of us specks say or do will ever create any kind of microscopic ripple that goes anywhere beyond our zone of speckiness, your life is useless, kiddo, and nothing anyone ever does will amount to anything in the universe, we could all die at this very second and the universe would still go on, nothing matters, the human race should just commit mass suicide to at the very least save mother nature on the earth we are an infectious disease upon. The world will end someday, and the universe will go on without us, never even stopping to even think about any small achievement that any human ever made. You will never see other planets, you're stuck on this shithole we call earth. And that's why you should just end your sorry life now and save yourself the trouble of having to come to terms with your own uselessness. you are nothing, everything is nothing , and the sooner we realize that, the better off we will be as a species.
Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels. Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the “loser,” and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round. I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment. When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3×5 card reading, “Please use this M&M for breeding purposes.” This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this “grant money.” I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion. There can be only one.
What in Davy Jones’ locker did ye just bark at me, ye scurvy bilgerat? I’ll have ye know I be the meanest cutthroat on the seven seas, and I’ve led numerous raids on fishing villages, and raped over 300 wenches. I be trained in hit-and-run pillaging and be the deadliest with a pistol of all the captains on the high seas. Ye be nothing to me but another source o’ swag. I’ll have yer guts for garters and keel haul ye like never been done before, hear me true. You think ye can hide behind your newfangled computing device? Think twice on that, scallywag. As we parley I be contacting my secret network o’ pirates across the sea and yer port is being tracked right now so ye better prepare for the typhoon, weevil. The kind o’ monsoon that’ll wipe ye off the map. You’re sharkbait, fool. I can sail anywhere, in any waters, and can kill ye in o’er seven hundred ways, and that be just with me hook and fist. Not only do I be top o’ the line with a cutlass, but I have an entire pirate fleet at my beck and call and I’ll damned sure use it all to wipe yer arse off o’ the world, ye dog. If only ye had had the foresight to know what devilish wrath your jibe was about to incur, ye might have belayed the comment. But ye couldn’t, ye didn’t, and now ye’ll pay the ultimate toll, you buffoon. I’ll shit fury all over ye and ye’ll drown in the depths o’ it. You’re fish food now, lad.
so, i got drunk multiple times in the last few weeks. one of them started off as a buzz at a bar where i met a cat who got all of the crazy references i throw out. said he could do some yard work. i always have leaves. came by the one day, said, yeah, it'd be this much (a pittance) X hours at most. said he gets up early would be around by 7... never showed up the first day..... never contacted me until like 3 days later, family emergency came up, the day he finally started, just to clear the leaves out of my yard.... what a fucking chore it's been. cat came on two separate occasions now, paid him slightly more than the original quote, said he won't take anymore money and i already paid him too much, through this process, I'd say I'm paying for this guy's drug habit, but if that were the case, he'd have finished on day 1.
well, i tried to divert the discussion, guess me paying a cat to not clear the leaves out of my yard because we vibed and they look like they should be playing in NOFX couldn't compete with whatever dull shit is getting paragraphs about now, too drunk to care or read, never will.
well, i tried to divert the discussion, guess me paying a cat to not clear the leaves out of my yard because we vibed and they look like they should be playing in NOFX couldn't compete with whatever dull shit is getting paragraphs about now, too drunk to care or read, never will.
DO IT, just DO IT! Don’t let your dreams be dreams. Yesterday, you said tomorrow. So just. DO IT! Make. your dreams. COME TRUE! Just… do it! Some people dream of success, while you’re gonna wake up and work HARD at it! NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE!You should get to the point where anyone else would quit, and you’re not gonna stop there. NO! What are you waiting for? … DO IT! Just… DO IT! Yes you can! Just do it! If you’re tired of starting over, stop. giving. up.