Atlanta, GA - Dreft Woolite, spokesperson for the Association of Southern States Laundry Operator Administrators and Directors (ASSLOAD), reports in a press release that the area's laundromats are highly anticipating the post-bowl season usage of their businesses. "All these fatass front-running SEC 'tards have a t-shirt for EVERY SINGLE SEC team including 3 or 4 'Bama shirts. After a bowl season where ESPN has ensured any team from the SEC that could possibly win an OOC game is playing, you can imagine how much in-demand these laundromats will be." Mr. Woolite continued "Every muffin-topped hoodrat baby mama will be washing all those shirts and most have sizable families increasing the load." Sales of Flaming Hot Cheetos, Family-Size bags of 3 Musketeers Bite Size, and DIET R. C. Cola are expected to see sales bumps as well.
Laundries in S.E. USA anticipate record earnings
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