Possum In The Garage

Several years ago some friends of mine had a possum in their backyard. They wanted it gone, but were having trouble getting rid of it.

Their teenage son decides he'll take care of it.

So, my friend gets home from work and his son says "I got that possum today. Killed him, he's in the trash can".

My buddy says, "Are you sure you killed it?"

His son: "I punked that motherfucker. It's dead".

My buddy: "Where is it?"

Son: "In the trash can".

My buddy says "let's go see it". So they go over to the trash can, his son takes the lid off and gets the shit scared out of him when confronted with a very pissed off, hissing possum.
 
You want them to stay in the yard. Outer yard, preferably.


I mean, it depends on your yard entirely. If yer in some cookie cutter subdivision, trap it and deal accordingly.

If you got any kinda wooded area on yer lot, let it be.
 
You should tame it. You'll be the coolest guy in town walking around with a friendly possum on your shoulder
 
when the daughter was younger,
she raised meat rabbits for show -
one evening she went out to feed the rabbits,
and there was a big ol possum
on top of the pens,
with his rack of teeth showin -
she wouldn't go out to feed after dark
for quite a while after that -
I'd go out there with a .410 and give that fucker something to grin at. Growing up, my Dad was kind to all animals but if one ever fucked with us on our property around the house, he didn't live to do it twice. A rooster flogged me when I was five. "Go inside the house, son." {booooom}
 
Ya'll aren't going to believe what happened. So after I tore up the garage, put it back together and put food out that wasn't eaten, I felt this was done. My wife and I are watching TV and we hear a thud in the garage so I go out there and it's back. I get the grabber, get him and drag him outside but the fucker gets out right outside my garage and runs back in under my car.

I sweep under the car can't flush him so I back up and look underneath and he isn't there. Fucker has climbed into my under carriage. I pull the car out and leave it parked in the driveway. This is why I can't find the bastard and how he is getting in.

I'm going to have to trap him.
 
Best leave this to Bigfoot.


IMG_7747.GIF
 
@Wild Turkey why are you gonna trap it? Do you plan to relocate him?
 
@Wild Turkey why are you gonna trap it? Do you plan to relocate him?
My neighbor has a live trap so I am going to set it. I'm really hoping I can keep him out by not leaving my car out and making sure the garage is closed at all times. If I trap him I will relocate him.

I just don't understand why he wants in my garage because there is no food and no water and until this morning it hasn't been particularly cold. He seems very interested in a basket I have of cleaning type supplies, WD40, Frebreeze and such but I don't know what that has his interest. Having dragged him out by the neck twice hopefully will be a deterrent.

I just don't want the damn thing in my house.
 
My neighbor has a live trap so I am going to set it. I'm really hoping I can keep him out by not leaving my car out and making sure the garage is closed at all times. If I trap him I will relocate him.

I just don't understand why he wants in my garage because there is no food and no water and until this morning it hasn't been particularly cold. He seems very interested in a basket I have of cleaning type supplies, WD40, Frebreeze and such but I don't know what that has his interest. Having dragged him out by the neck twice hopefully will be a deterrent.

I just don't want the damn thing in my house.
You've become with possums what Bill Murray was to gophers.

gopher dancing GIF
 
My neighbor has a live trap so I am going to set it. I'm really hoping I can keep him out by not leaving my car out and making sure the garage is closed at all times. If I trap him I will relocate him.

I just don't understand why he wants in my garage because there is no food and no water and until this morning it hasn't been particularly cold. He seems very interested in a basket I have of cleaning type supplies, WD40, Frebreeze and such but I don't know what that has his interest. Having dragged him out by the neck twice hopefully will be a deterrent.

I just don't want the damn thing in my house.

I think you should relocate him to heaven
 
I think you should relocate him to heaven
My wife would stroke out. When I had him by the neck she was worried I was hurting him....like I'm the bad one in that scenario. There is a narrative in her head that it's a mother and I can't relocate it because the babies would die.

You've just got no idea what I'm dealing with on this one.
 
My wife would stroke out. When I had him by the neck she was worried I was hurting him....like I'm the bad one in that scenario. There is a narrative in her head that it's a mother and I can't relocate it because the babies would die.

You've just got no idea what I'm dealing with on this one.

kill it and tell your wife you took it to a nice farm with lots of hills and wide open spaces where it can run and play every day.
 
My wife would stroke out. When I had him by the neck she was worried I was hurting him....like I'm the bad one in that scenario. There is a narrative in her head that it's a mother and I can't relocate it because the babies would die.

You've just got no idea what I'm dealing with on this one.
FFS
 
My neighbor has a live trap so I am going to set it. I'm really hoping I can keep him out by not leaving my car out and making sure the garage is closed at all times. If I trap him I will relocate him.

I just don't understand why he wants in my garage because there is no food and no water and until this morning it hasn't been particularly cold. He seems very interested in a basket I have of cleaning type supplies, WD40, Frebreeze and such but I don't know what that has his interest. Having dragged him out by the neck twice hopefully will be a deterrent.

I just don't want the damn thing in my house.

you're.....*gasp*....you're the opossum whisperer! . . .
 
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