Things you don’t understand

Illustrious Potentate

Illustrious Potentate

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I don’t understand how there are people with a four limbs that are all fully functioning that don’t know how to swim, not even doggie paddle. Babies instinctively doggie paddle in water. Pretty much if you’re able bodied and can’t swim, I just assume you’re retarded. I never had to be taught. It’s one of those things you should figure out on your own by age five at the latest.
 
DragonFromTo said:
All of the things that he can't do are just completely unimportant and useless dontchaknow... :wink:
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There’s not much that I can’t do. I’m undefeated at Indian leg wrestling and soggy biscuit

But swimming is pretty much just a basic body movement that able bodied people have no excuse to not be able to do
 
I also don’t understand people that have trouble getting out of bed in the mornings. I’m lucky to get 3-4 hours of sleep in a night and I get up at 4 AM and that’s with me drinking every night too. I know that bed is comfortable and you’re tired, but you get over it pretty quick when you get up and start moving around
 
Illustrious Potentate said:
There’s not much that I can’t do. I’m undefeated at Indian leg wrestling and soggy biscuit

But swimming is pretty much just a basic body movement that able bodied people have no excuse to not be able to do
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If you say so. I can admit that no matter how many things I learn to do there will always be more that I don't know/can still learn. But I'm not as cool as you.
 
Illustrious Potentate said:
I don’t understand how there are people with a four limbs that are all fully functioning that don’t know how to swim, not even doggie paddle. Babies instinctively doggie paddle in water. Pretty much if you’re able bodied and can’t swim, I just assume you’re retarded. I never had to be taught. It’s one of those things you should figure out on your own by age five at the latest.
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I’ve thought this for the longest time. Like your body should figure it out naturally within the first three seconds of getting in “too deep” water. The water is doing half the work to hold you up, within three seconds of flailing around, your body should figure out the rest to keep your head above water.
 
Deep Dish Pizza Goat said:
I’ve thought this for the longest time. Like your body should figure it out naturally within the first three seconds of getting in “too deep” water. The water is doing half the work to hold you up, within three seconds of flailing around, your body should figure out the rest to keep your head above water.
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Doggie paddling is inefficient, but still effective. Never seen a dog that couldn’t swim and our feet make for better fins than dog paws. I don’t get it
 
Illustrious Potentate said:
Doggie paddling is inefficient, but still effective. Never seen a dog that couldn’t swim and our feet make for better fins than dog paws. I don’t get it
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Whenever I hear “drowned in lake” I’m just mind blown.

No waves. No rapids. No riptide. Just standing water.

How?
 
Illustrious Potentate said:
I don’t understand how there are people with a four limbs that are all fully functioning that don’t know how to swim, not even doggie paddle. Babies instinctively doggie paddle in water. Pretty much if you’re able bodied and can’t swim, I just assume you’re retarded. I never had to be taught. It’s one of those things you should figure out on your own by age five at the latest.
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IMG_7294.gif
 
In response to this threads title, how people can be “too sick” to work from home.

If you have an office job and especially a work from home gig, you don’t have 8 hours of work a day to do. Even if you’re feeling “too sick” to sit at a desk for 8 hours at home, you can at least make an attempt to work in spurts to get shit done.

I’ve probably felt “too sick” to be able to sit in a chair for maybe ten minutes of my life. After those ten minutes, I was good to go to sit on my ass and touch keys on a keyboard, with all kinds of tummy aches and coughing.



“BUT THEY SHOULD BE RESTING!” …they are, they are sitting on their ass, like they do every day at work.
 
Deep Dish Pizza Goat said:
Whenever I hear “drowned in lake” I’m just mind blown.

No waves. No rapids. No riptide. Just standing water.

How?
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Every year somebody drowns trying to swim across the lake at our local beach. Usually get caught in weeds and tire out.
 
RobBase said:
Every year somebody drowns trying to swim across the lake at our local beach. Usually get caught in weeds and tire out.
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Caught in weeds? What the fuck? Like a human getting caught in a net of weeds? The fuck sort of lake is this shit?
 
How people can function in society with zero decision-making skills. This weekend, the girls asked me to make pizzas. So, I go to the store to get stuff to make pizzas. Go to grab some mushrooms, there’s a couple camped out in front of them.

I had some other things to get in that area, went and got them and looked…still camped out. Went over said excuse me and grabbed what I needed. Went over to get some beer, got that and looked over at the produce section and they are still fucking camped out in front of of the mushrooms. How hard is this fucking decision? Just grab something and get on with your life.
 
williewilliejuan said:
How people can function in society with zero decision-making skills. This weekend, the girls asked me to make pizzas. So, I go to the store to get stuff to make pizzas. Go to grab some mushrooms, there’s a couple camped out in front of them.

I had some other things to get in that area, went and got them and looked…still camped out. Went over said excuse me and grabbed what I needed. Went over to get some beer, got that and looked over at the produce section and they are still fucking camped out in front of of the mushrooms. How hard is this fucking decision? Just grab something and get on with your life.
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On the same token of that, when you decide to go to a restaurant ahead of time and then you need to read the menu.

Like, we picked this restaurant, it’s 2025, the menu has been in our pocket for six hours before we even arrived. Very rarely is the waitress going to throw us such a curveball with the potential “daily specials” where we need to contemplate any further. Shit drives me nuts that we have to do the 15 minute “should I give you a few minutes to look at the menu?” pony show.
 
williewilliejuan said:
How people can function in society with zero decision-making skills. This weekend, the girls asked me to make pizzas. So, I go to the store to get stuff to make pizzas. Go to grab some mushrooms, there’s a couple camped out in front of them.

I had some other things to get in that area, went and got them and looked…still camped out. Went over said excuse me and grabbed what I needed. Went over to get some beer, got that and looked over at the produce section and they are still fucking camped out in front of of the mushrooms. How hard is this fucking decision? Just grab something and get on with your life.
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They made a great decision. They don't have an air conditioner :wink:

 
Deep Dish Pizza Goat said:
On the same token of that, when you decide to go to a restaurant ahead of time and then you need to read the menu.

Like, we picked this restaurant, it’s 2025, the menu has been in our pocket for six hours before we even arrived. Very rarely is the waitress going to throw us such a curveball with the potential “daily specials” where we need to contemplate any further. Shit drives me nuts that we have to do the 15 minute “should I give you a few minutes to look at the menu?” pony show.
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My grandpa is 82 and doesn’t have any kind of cell phone. I go eat breakfast with him at least one Saturday per month. He’s looking at a menu, and since he is, I might as well too
 
I don’t understand how people can wear basketball shorts throughout the day. I’d be so paranoid about my keys/phone/wallet slipping out of those pockets. I wear overalls, so it would be extra nerve wracking for me. I wear em to the gym, but leave my wallet in my truck, and I’m the only one there when I go, so just leave my phone and keys on a bench I won’t be using
 
Deep Dish Pizza Goat said:
Whenever I hear “drowned in lake” I’m just mind blown.

No waves. No rapids. No riptide. Just standing water.

How?
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No waves in a lake?

That’s a small lake.

I would bet my left AND middle testicle that I’m a better swimmer than you are and there countless scenarios in which I could drown in a lake.
 
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