tOfficial Night Shift Thread v64, Mario Bros. Edition.

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My wife doesn't really like it burnt but she will usually eat it that way if she does it.

It's like the one thing she will accept in less-than-satisfactory condition. Weird I know.
"one" thing hmmm.... something tells me there are at least 2 things she "accepts" in "less-than-satisfactory condition"
 
Oh, sorry. I thought you were in Minneapolis.
fuck my life fml GIF
 
I keep the boss's hidden so they can't do that. I don't go so far as to have it all hashed out like some people, but I do block 7-6p every day. The plebs aren't allowed to just plop shit on his calendar, excuse the term, all willy-nilly.
I don’t block off time on mine because it doesn’t matter. People will send meetings anyway. I can’t see my boss’s calendar because he technically works for a different company (for tax reasons), so I have to ask him his availability to schedule anything.
 
@HammerDown whats with all these reboots lately? am i just that unlucky to be on here when they happen? Not like im some kinda post whore
 
Alexa? Is that you?? THAT'S WHAT I PUT IT AT!! And it turned out pretty good... ever so slightly underdone, but half a tick up and it would have been...well...

Cbs Toast GIF by HULU
Okay, now you've done it. Toast and sister in law tales forthcoming.

She watched our dumb dog a few weekends ago while we were camping, and when we got home, I just knew SOMETHING would be fucky. She is like 4 for 4 so far this year, (ripped top off of washing machine, left a pile of soaking wet towels on top of the washing machine for 6 days, etc.)

Well, we get home, and the wife had bought Thomas bagels cuz there were no Franz..(vastly superior, but I digress) So the first day, the shitty Thomas bagel tore fucky and there was a chunk on one side sticking out. I toast it, smells burnt. Take it out...the chunk is charred. Case solved. Next day...toast a shitty Thomas bagel, and it smells shitty again. Figure it's some residual from the day before. Dismiss it. Next day, the same. Dismiss it. Finally decide to tip it over and dump the crumbs out.

There are two..not one, but TWO whole cherry pop tarts stuck down in the bottom. (the retards eat em'). They'll slip thru the cage like 1 out of 100 tries, and her dumbass manages to do it twice in one setting, and then either just magically forgot, or washed her hands of it, and walked the fuck away.

I swear to God...this woman hurts my soul.
 
Okay, now you've done it. Toast and sister in law tales forthcoming.

She watched our dumb dog a few weekends ago while we were camping, and when we got home, I just knew SOMETHING would be fucky. She is like 4 for 4 so far this year, (ripped top off of washing machine, left a pile of soaking wet towels on top of the washing machine for 6 days, etc.)

Well, we get home, and the wife had bought Thomas bagels cuz there were no Franz..(vastly superior, but I digress) So the first day, the shitty Thomas bagel tore fucky and there was a chunk on one side sticking out. I toast it, smells burnt. Take it out...the chunk is charred. Case solved. Next day...toast a shitty Thomas bagel, and it smells shitty again. Figure it's some residual from the day before. Dismiss it. Next day, the same. Dismiss it. Finally decide to tip it over and dump the crumbs out.

There are two..not one, but TWO whole cherry pop tarts stuck down in the bottom. (the retards eat em'). They'll slip thru the cage like 1 out of 100 tries, and her dumbass manages to do it twice in one setting, and then either just magically forgot, or washed her hands of it, and walked the fuck away.

I swear to God...this woman hurts my soul.
Yeah, but have you ever had the thomas's english muffin bagels? :drool: I can't seem to find them anywhere anymore!
 
Yeah, but have you ever had the thomas's english muffin bagels? :drool: I can't seem to find them anywhere anymore!
Can't say I have, but my weird brain just somehow chalked the shitty smell up to the shitty bagels. lulz.

It was like a week before I figured it out. :lol:
 
OH, FUCK YOU, TECHNOLOGY!!!

I got the bitch-out email that I HAVE to update to the 15. whatever (not 16) on muh iphone for work sekkurrrity purposes or whatever. So I go to manually update and it installs all the prep shit. Meanwhile, I'm planning a trip with my cousin for next month so i'm looking up flights/hotels with my work/member discounts. Well, the stupid REAL install starts so it makes my phone inaccessible. So I go to my 'puta to do the flight/hotel searches. Well, IT made me clear my cookies a couple weeks ago, so now i need to re-enter my password. I don't remember the goddamn password, but I have a cheat sheet on my phone. My phone that I can't access because it's busy doing a hundred hour update!! :gaah:
 
So in my experience the first set on 3 come out slightly under, but the following toast (now that is preheated) is always perfectly toasted.
:idea: moment!
Run it with nothing in it first, then pop some bread in there after it warms up!

Adam Sandler Adult Humor GIF
 
Okay, now you've done it. Toast and sister in law tales forthcoming.

She watched our dumb dog a few weekends ago while we were camping, and when we got home, I just knew SOMETHING would be fucky. She is like 4 for 4 so far this year, (ripped top off of washing machine, left a pile of soaking wet towels on top of the washing machine for 6 days, etc.)

Well, we get home, and the wife had bought Thomas bagels cuz there were no Franz..(vastly superior, but I digress) So the first day, the shitty Thomas bagel tore fucky and there was a chunk on one side sticking out. I toast it, smells burnt. Take it out...the chunk is charred. Case solved. Next day...toast a shitty Thomas bagel, and it smells shitty again. Figure it's some residual from the day before. Dismiss it. Next day, the same. Dismiss it. Finally decide to tip it over and dump the crumbs out.

There are two..not one, but TWO whole cherry pop tarts stuck down in the bottom. (the retards eat em'). They'll slip thru the cage like 1 out of 100 tries, and her dumbass manages to do it twice in one setting, and then either just magically forgot, or washed her hands of it, and walked the fuck away.

I swear to God...this woman hurts my soul.
Your SIL and my SIL should meet. It would undoubtedly lead to their deaths by no fault of ours. I'll even throw my BIL in.
 
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