true story
one of my best friends is a chick, first girl i went on a date with after my exwife bailed on me. truth be told, shes enamored with me. always has been. tells me she loves me, but we're friends. we used to fuck around, but its been years. she actually got sick of chasing me, so she introduced me to my psycho ex.
so, we spend time together. friends. shes got a lot of qualities i want in someone, but shes missing some key ones. mostly, i smoke a shit ton of pot. i dont drink. she loves wine, and hates pot...tho her entire family smokes (shes not anti pot, and is fine with me doing what i need to, but its a big issue for me). she also has asymptomatic MS (which i have been telling her for years, it is her answer).
im at a crossroads i guess. shes great, would treat me like a freakin king...but...my conundrum is as follows:
-shes not "hot". im holding out for another hot one. superficial, maybe, but i know what i am attracted to.
- i want a girl i can smoke with. its huge for me. she insists it would be fine. i dunno. it would feel hollow me to. i like to wake and bake on a saturday, hit a diner, and do shit. thats not her bag.
- bonus is, her brother is the undersecretary to a US ambassador. hes in serbia right now. he goes, all over the world, to wherever he gets "stationed". she gets to go visit him for weeks ata time, with full US govt privileges. Limos, guards, dining at state houses...she goes once a year to wherever he is, and gets basically a free vacation. shes always asking me to go. that would be pretty awesome.
so, my problem is...shes awesome, deserves someone who REALLY wants her badly (which i dont, tho i do love her)...
s
but she insists we should get married and says "you'll fall in love with me eventually".
ugh
end rant