Happy Slave Owning White Guy Monday

Having a house with like 75 light fixtures and smoke detectors is great. Except you can't go about a month without replacing a light bulb or detector.
 
Treating the D like it's a dog shit?

Might as well have the broad put a sandwich baggy over her hands while she tugs too eh?
I don't know any girls who would rub their hands on dog shit like that...
 
Having a house with like 75 light fixtures and smoke detectors is great. Except you can't go about a month without replacing a light bulb or detector.
#humblebrag

time to invest in LEDs, broseph.
 
A broad who doesn't accept the D?

Im Out Shark Tank GIF by ABC Network
she IS a dude...with a glass eye
 
That’s how I am with diverticulitis. First time I got it I almost needed to be hospitalized because I waited so long before going to the doc. Now I recognize the feeling almost immediately and just start myself on antibiotics and drink a ton of water to flush the system. But after the last time there was talk of having surgery to remove the problem area of my digestive system.
I give her credit for her dedication sticking to her made up story to avoid watching basketball with me
 
Not even sure what this means.

Also, mouth stuff is gross because dudes have mouths.
When gay men have sex how do they decide which one of them's penis opens up to accept the other penis?
 
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